What?

Blogging straight from my phone.
This is real life adult stuff going on right now. Except not really and I'm gonna try really hard to keep ugly typo's out of this post.
But don't expect too much from me. Woke up sick this morning.
Which is why I'm here.
After discussing the vitamin C values in apple juice vs. lemonade (both of the frozen juice persuasion) (also, I, with the apple argument, won) we were lying in bed muttering to each other in sickbrain garbled tongues.
Mark: it's not a too dangerous. It's not like your brain will blow up or anything.
Me: I just know your eardrums can get blown if you aren't careful.
We talked about my trip to the ENT, where he thought I said EMT and got all panicky, and I mentioned my symptoms were back.
Mark: well what did he give you? Pills or what?
Me: Ummm, I think I actually still have some.
Mark: you need to use it. Basically the minute your symptoms came back you should've started using it again.
Me: It's not that bad! You don't need to worry!
Mark: But....I have to worry. I love you and i care about things that are gonna make your head explode!
Me: You said my head wouldn't explode!
Mark: Don't listen to me, I'm hysterical.
Basically we both may or may not die on our way to our first vacation since the honeymoon. Woooo.
Cool story, so yesterday we were awesome people and rode our bikes to the grocery store and picked up some essentials. Bummer that stores are all paranoid about backpacks, else it woulda been much simpler to carry home a mega pack of paper towels, two loaves of bread, a pack of granulated sugar, and two half gallons of milk.
But we did it. Somehow. I'm not sure how I'm still living considering i put the milk and sugar in my purse and carried it all on my left side.
When we got home, I'd planned on rewarding our efforts with leftover snickerdoodle cookies but we were mostly just so thirsty.
So we sliced open our honeydew melon and ate an entire half each, digging out juicy spoonfuls of sweet flesh.
Rather like a pair of classy zombies enjoying the brains of their poor, human prey.
At least that's what it felt like.

I'm going back to sleep. Where's the ibuprofen??

Edit: 
Mark: Ooh, ooh ooh, ooooh! [singing]
Me: [raises eyebrows]
Mark: [stroking my big toe and still singing] I like your toooee!

The end.