Wednesday, February 12, 2014

Choo Choo!

Train of thought that I just had right now;

Missisauga - Wreck it, Ralph!

How does the magical land of Canada turn into a Disney film?

Missisauga - Sauga - Saga - Candy Crush Saga - King Candy - Wreck it, Ralph!

What is brain and why?

Today has been so bizarre. Bizarro!

I woke up fighting the urge to take a sick day and just attempt to catch up on life but then I remembered $$$ dolla dolla billz, so I dragged myself out of bed and pinned my hair back and pretended like I'm a high functioning adult with admirable grown up qualities such as the ability to pack a decent lunch.
I made it as far as hot pocket.
Baby steps.
The drive was fine, other than time travelling of course, because I could swear I was running late, I went my normal cruise speed of 65 and got to work 5 minutes early so I sat in my car and acted like it was on purpose.
I went inside and set down to work and everything was grand. And then it was lunchtime and I remembered quite suddenly that I had finished the Harry Potter series last night and I kind of wanted to just lay in the break room and sob.
But instead I decided, "I'll just go on a nice refreshing walk, then! I haven't gone out to the nifty scenic dirt road at the edge of our office complex for a few months..." and I proverbially patted myself on the back for choosing a heart healthy way to spend my lunch hour.
Except I'm a law abider and they finally put up a sign :(

I need front facing camera to take pictures, it turns out. So the letters are backwards, DEAL.
So after I wasted my lunch hour sitting in the dirt and watching funny youtube vloggers, I headed back in to work and was met with the glorious sight of a large Costco cake in the break room. There aren't even any birthday's happening in the office right now. I guess one of the guys was out and about and just decided the break room was severely lacking in the "cake" department. At least some people are staying on top of things...
I am sup totes confuzzled by payroll right now. We were gone two weeks ago (two weeks??! is that all it's been??) and I got a text from a coworker saying that my check had gone to some random other plant for some unknown reason which is fine, we're not scrapped or anything, but then I got back and, two days ago I got an email with no other information inside but "797881264***"...luckily, at least the subject line said "FedEx tracking" so I knew to try and put that in there.
But then it said "Expected Delivery Date: 12/02/2014" and I dunno that seemed a tiny bit off to me. Regardless of what the tracking number was really for considering I have no way to know if it was actually for my paycheck or some other random thing that I've just forgot about because that is also highly likely. Probable, even.
They still haven't answered my emails.
Most likely because of Mother Nature and her tendency lately to end all things work related on the east coast.
I need answers, people!
So basically, I resolved to face up to adulthood a week ago and all of a sudden it's caught up with me and weird crap is popping up all over and I definitely shoulda just stayed huddled under my blanket this morning. Cuz I didn't even finish my cake it was making me feel sick. Probably unaided by my poorly thought-out decision in helping myself to a absolutely hugetastic piece. #sugaroverload
But really about the adulthood thing, Mark and I are making grocery list and actually preparing and cooking meals and writing down chores on the calendar and checking them off when we've done them. It's going relatively well. Except for today, of course. Whatever rabbit hole I fell down.

[WARNING: Spiders ahead]

So I had this dream last night.
And I'm pretty sure it was because of the nasty bunches of cobwebs that I had to clear from our bookshelves as I was rearranging our book collection last night. Yech.
But I dreamt of this old abandoned Victorian house that me and my sisters were going to be staying in for some reason. I missed the beginning part of my dream where everything gets explained, it would seem. But then I was watching this video feed from a security camera in the old house (?) 
and it was following a child that looked like Samara wearing a pale blue, frilly dress as she walked through the door into the kitchen.

But she had a mean face.
And only I could see her.
But then we were in the house, my sisters were running around like crazies, screaming, and pointing at a grotesque looking spider in the corner above the stove. It was large, the size of my palm, and had sharply angled legs and a white, glassy bum that was swollen to the size of a tennis ball.
I had a ziploc bag I was trying to shut it into, but when I touched the web it dropped into the air, swinging around on it's web and obviously trying to get into my hair.
I swooped it out of the air into my ziploc bag but whenever I tried to zip it shut, it would scurry it's way back out of the back so I was stuck trying to shake it back down to the bottom and get the bag closed. 
I eventually did but then suddenly it's legs were 10 inches long, thick and covered in bristly hairs as it wriggled out of the bag and scratching my hands.
I was really worried about smashing it for some reason, like it would only multiply if I punctured the milky sac that was it's butt...
Guys, it was a terrible dream.
I also hallucinated twice during the night, waking up and thinking I could see large bugs scrambling along our ceiling or up the bed posts. The first time there actually was something moving along the ceiling but Mark woke up with me and assured me it was just a reflection of light dancing across the room from a moving car. Ah, the joys of having to remove proper eyesight for the night in the form of glasses and contacts.

All things considered, I should hate sleeping.
But I don't.
It's my second favorite hobby.

Well this post has been sufficiently random. Bless you for making it all the way through. You deserve a cookie.


  1. Hahahahaha I LOVED that episode of Cake Boss hahaha but seriously, spiders.........I'm now going to have nightmares.......thanks. :P

    1. I'm guessing you're talking about the muppet gif? I've never actually watched Cake Boss, haha x]